How to Feel Better About Living Far Away from Family When I first moved to the US from Great Britain nine years ago, I had no idea that it would become my permanent home. I originally traveled to Miami on a two year work placement. It was such an exciting opportunity for a 20-something… I just couldn’t pass it up.
Little did I know that I would end up falling in love, getting married and settling down in Atlanta. Not to mention having two beautiful children here!
I love the life that we’ve made for ourselves over the last few years, but it hasn’t always been easy. Deciding to live so far away from the family I love, and the country in which I grew up, has probably been the single most difficult choice I’ve ever made.
How to Feel Better About Living Far Away from Family
Moving far away from family is one of the most challenging decisions a person can make, especially when the bonds of family run deep. Whether it’s for a new job opportunity, a relationship, or simply a desire to start fresh, the emotional toll of being separated from loved ones can be significant. In my own experience of moving from Great Britain to the US nine years ago, what started as a temporary work placement in Miami led to a life I never anticipated. I fell in love, got married, and now have two beautiful children, all while building a life in Atlanta. While I’m incredibly grateful for the life I’ve made here, living so far from my family has been the hardest part.
Here are some strategies I’ve learned along the way to help cope with the feelings that come with living far away from family.
Acknowledge and Accept Your Emotions
The first step in feeling better about living far away from family is to acknowledge your emotions. It’s completely normal to feel sad, lonely, or even guilty about being far from loved ones. I remember the wave of mixed emotions that came when I realized my two-year work placement had turned into something permanent. Embracing those feelings instead of pushing them away can be surprisingly healing.
Give yourself permission to feel homesick. Accept that it’s okay to miss your family and the familiar comforts of your home country. It’s also okay to grieve the moments you might miss, like family gatherings, birthdays, or holidays. Once you accept these emotions as a natural part of the process, they may start to feel less overwhelming.
Stay Connected Through Technology
Technology has been a lifeline for me in maintaining close relationships with my family. When I first moved, video calls weren’t as commonplace, but now, platforms like Zoom, FaceTime, and WhatsApp make it easy to stay in touch, no matter the distance. Regular video chats with my parents, siblings, and friends back in the UK have become a cherished routine. Even though I’m not physically present, being able to see their faces and share updates on our lives helps bridge the emotional gap.
Scheduling weekly or bi-weekly calls can create a sense of consistency, giving both you and your family something to look forward to. And don’t underestimate the power of sending regular texts, photos, or even letters. A simple message saying, “I’m thinking of you,” can do wonders to maintain a strong connection.
Build a Support Network in Your New Home
Living far away from family means that it’s important to establish a support network in your new home. This could include friends, neighbors, or even coworkers. When I moved to Atlanta, I realized the importance of building relationships outside of my family. It wasn’t easy at first, but I gradually found a group of friends who have become like family to me.
It’s crucial to invest time in building meaningful connections in your new community. Whether through work, social groups, or community events, these relationships can provide a sense of belonging and support. Over time, you’ll find that these people will become your go-to when you need a helping hand or someone to share special moments with.
Create New Traditions
One of the hardest parts about living far away from family is missing out on family traditions, especially around the holidays. I used to get incredibly homesick during Christmas, wishing I could be in the UK to celebrate with my family. But over the years, I’ve learned to create new traditions with my own family in the US.
If you have children, creating new traditions can be particularly meaningful. It helps to focus on the family you’re with, making new memories that are uniquely yours. Whether it’s starting a new holiday tradition, exploring local events, or planning weekend outings, creating these moments of joy can help ease the pain of being far from loved ones.
Plan Visits and Travel
Knowing that you have a visit planned, either for you to go back home or for family to visit you, can make a world of difference. When my children were born, my parents made it a point to visit us in Atlanta as often as they could, and those visits have been priceless. Similarly, planning trips back to the UK allows me to reconnect with my roots and spend quality time with family.
If distance or finances make frequent visits difficult, even planning a trip once a year can give you something to look forward to. In the meantime, sending care packages, or receiving one from home, can offer a tangible connection to your family and culture.
Focus on the Positives
As difficult as it is to live far away from family, it’s also important to focus on the positives of your situation. Reflect on the reasons you made the decision to move in the first place. For me, I was able to seize a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for career growth and personal development. I fell in love and created a family of my own, something that wouldn’t have been possible if I hadn’t taken that leap.
It’s okay to feel proud of what you’ve accomplished, even if it means making some sacrifices along the way. Living in a new country has exposed me to new cultures, experiences, and friendships that have enriched my life in ways I never imagined.
Practice Self-Care
Lastly, taking care of yourself emotionally and mentally is essential when dealing with the challenges of living far from family. When homesickness hits, it’s important to practice self-care. This can include anything from going for a walk, journaling, meditating, or engaging in hobbies that bring you joy.
For me, finding small moments of self-care has helped manage the emotional ups and downs. Sometimes it’s as simple as making a cup of tea that reminds me of home, or cooking a British meal that brings comfort. Engaging in activities that ground you and bring a sense of familiarity can be a powerful way to cope with distance.
Living far away from family is never easy, but it’s possible to find ways to make it more manageable. Acknowledging your feelings, staying connected, and building a support system in your new home are all steps toward easing the emotional burden. While the physical distance may remain, the emotional closeness doesn’t have to fade. With time, patience, and a little self-care, it’s possible to thrive even when your loved ones are miles away.
